The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
