Screwed.edu
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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