Screwed.edu
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize