from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Randomize
