You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
