I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
