You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
