does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
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