there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
