it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize