Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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