we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
He? As in you personified your dick?
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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