I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
