mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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