I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize
