dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
