What did we do last night that was yellow?
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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