My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize