WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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