I want to make a zoo with you.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
