I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
