the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
