went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
