escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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