More tranny stories later!
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
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