This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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