he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
