Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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