how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
