Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Randomize
