I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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