Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
the raccoons are back...
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