you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
