did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize