woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize