He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I smell like Dick and happiness
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize
