Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Randomize
