your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Randomize