i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
We left an ass print on the piano.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
