You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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