honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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