Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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