i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Green mimosas i think yes
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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