go do what you do best...puke behind churches
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
