Tell her she can't have a vagina
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
