so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I'm passing your future prison.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize