I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize