He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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