well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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