i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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