Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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