Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
